Tuesday, August 29, 2006

The Joy Of The Lord Is Your Strength

I had an awesome experience today. I knew 5 minutes into it that I would be blogging it as soon as I got home.

We bought a new car today at a dealership in Shingle Springs. I met with a sale manager I used to work with 10 years ago at my very first car sales job. His name is Aaron.

I hadn’t seen him since then. He looked older, but still friendly and funny and warm.

I remember him being a womanizer, boozer, and a party animal.

The story he told floored me.

We talked about cars, the old days, people we knew, etc, for the first hour or so. Then he started talking about his family.

He just married a wonderful blonde woman named Amber. When he spoke about her, I could see his eyes light up and I could see the love in his eyes.

They have a 12 month old healthy baby girl named Alise. The light of his life, the reason he doesn’t drink anymore, the reason he’s up at dawn ‘taking care of business.’

Alise had a twin, Alexis, who died at 4 months.

Aaron was in the NICU every day for 4 months. Two hours before work, and then all night until closing. The baby needed several surgeries to correct stomach and lung problems.

She breathed her last breath in his arms 4 days before last Christmas.

He said the grief almost killed him, but that he believed that God had him go through it because he could handle it.

I think it was because of the following testimony, something he hadn’t really considered.

He said that in the NICU, you make friends with the other parents with children there. He said he saw families with triplets who, over a three week period, had all three children die. Funerals, last rites, the whole shooting match. You are sharing a common experience, a common grief, that bonds people.

(I imagine that being on the mission field together is some pale shadow of a comparison.)

One couple sticks out in his mind. They were young -- and strong Christians. He remembered being surprised that kids of their generation were so into their faith. Their baby was in the NICU, but he never really knew why until the day that they were leaving the hospital.

He remembers them being happy, full of life, and loving toward everyone. Every day they came to him and with love and concern asked about his little one. They brought cheer to everyone in the NICU (a normally somber place) -- a smile, a laugh, a hug.

On one particularly hard day – bad news from the doctor – he mentioned to his wife how hard it all was.

“This sucks. Why did this happen to me? I know I did some bad things in my life, but, man, this is horrible. Look at all this bad news everywhere!”

His wife nodded in agreement. “Yeah, like them,” motioning to the happy couple.

“What? They are so happy! What happened?”

“They just found out that the baby has Down’s Syndrome. They’ve known all along that the baby is androgynous (no discernable male or female sexual organs) and that Down’s Syndrome was likely.” By the look on his face she added, “You didn’t know that?”

He was shocked. Could he have been so blind? Could he have been so naïve? He’d seen them for weeks, and they acted like there was nothing wrong in the world, like joy was a scent in the air to be breathed and enjoyed and savored. They were more openly concerned about everyone else rather than themselves.

All along their child, their first born, was among the sickest and the most genetically troubled of the group in the NICU.

He thought to himself, “What are MY problems? Why am I so down when they can be so happy? What am I missing?” It convicted him to his core.

He told me this, in a matter of fact tone – conversationally.

I almost cried. I said to him, “It says in the Bible that ‘the joy of the Lord is your strength.’ This is a perfect example of that. That’s one of the most powerful testimonies I have ever heard. I just heard the story, and I wasn’t there for all the details, but I’m sure that God wanted you to learn that through that experience. The whole world should hear that story.”

The lesson I took is this: You think you got problems? 99.9% of us AIN’T got problems. We have minor inconveniences. We have stubbed toes and hangnails, while other people have cancer and starvation.

And they are laughing and smiling.

The joy of the Lord is their strength.

Love everyone!

Dale

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Whoo hoo! God is good!

God just ROCKS!

I just got done with the M5 conference. I spoke this afternoon basically about the deals I've worked on since I went to the M5 conference last year, and the path I took and the mistakes I made, etc.

I spoke about how you need faith, hope and love, and how the real estate isn't the most important thing in your life, and that you need to get money out of the way as soon as possible so that you can focus on important things. I spoke about how you have to open yourself to God and follow His lead and not worry or be fearful.

Then I showed the Together Team Hoyt video (the man who runs with his paraplegic son.) There wasn't a dry eye in the place. People loved it. I got hugs and encouragement and thanks after I was through.

They give the students a sheet to evaluate each speaker, and when I looked through mine, they talked about the high energy, the inspiration, and the emotion in the video. The team in the back of the room counted the evaluations and I got 29 "10s" out of 38 responses -- the others were 8s and 9s. He told me that those are James Smith type numbers, and that he was mad he didn't see the presentation himself.

The greatest part of this is God did it all! My presentation was significantly different than the way I practiced it. All the practice of voice modulation and emoting and all that went out the window, but it all worked great because God was guiding my speech. He took over and used me as a puppet.

It was wonderful to be in the Spirit like that: I should have been terrified, but I was relaxed and in total faith.

Thanks for all the prayers and encouragement. I love you guys!

Dale

Sunday, August 20, 2006

My feelings during worship today

The FBC choir had a guest choir join them today. 40+ people filled the right half of the stage. The voice were pure and it sounded wonderful.

They played 'Mighty God', and I’ve never heard that song performed live where I wasn’t playing it .. it made me think back to my time with my friends in the FBC Worship Experience and how much I love and appreciate all of you .. I miss you in a deep way .. 'Mighty God' made me cry, not just for the message and the music (God does that to me all the time anyway) but for the recollection of our time together and our shared love and friendship ..

Each one of you made an impact in my life mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I’ve grown with you. You’ve helped make me a better man.

I appreciate you! I love you! I’m grateful for our time together. No matter what God does with me in the future, I’ll always have a cherished place in my heart for each of you ..

God bless!

Love,

Dale

Friday, August 18, 2006

Great quotes

While preparing for my talk at the M5, I stumbled across some great quotes that I think sum up some pretty important aspect of this life:

John of Salisbury -- 1159: “We are like dwarfs on the shoulders of giants, so that we can see more than they, and things at a greater distance, not by virtue of any sharpness of sight on our part, or any physical distinction, but because we are carried high and raised up by their giant size.”

Make sure to notice the date this was written. Dark ages. Bubonic Plague. Wars, death, Inquisition. Probably the most horrible bloody time in human history.

These roads that are before us have been forged before. We aren't whacking away at overgrowth with a machete; we are on an old interstate highway with a bunch of other cars. It is only on the shoulders of Giants (the Giant, Jesus) that we are here and that we have hope and love and faith. It's only because he's written His love on our hearts that we are even able to feel love.

So we aren't inventing any wheels. God built an Autobahn for us and gave us the keys to a new Ferrari and said, "Get in and follow My map .. "

Here's another:

Longfellow: "If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility."

Doesn't matter what kind of conflict you have, if you can see it from the other person's perspective -- truly see it, and not just empathize -- you will no doubt feel the weight of his idea.

It's habit #5 in Stephen Covey's The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: Seek First To Understand, Then Be Understood.

We all have concerns and we all have voices. We all want to be heard. Rarely in this hustle bustle world do we feel that we ARE heard.

From Fight Club:

"Narrator: When people think you're dying, they really, really listen to you, instead of just... Marla Singer: - instead of just waiting for their turn to speak?"

Hearing someone, and really understanding them and their voice, is like emotional air to people. If people think they are being heard, and that you care about them, then they will respect and love you to no end. Even if they were a mortal enemy, they will rethink their position about you, because you will move them in such a way that it breaks their paradigm about you.

It's really a powerful relationship-building technique. We are all on Spaceship Earth together, and we have to keep our hands and arms inside until the ride comes to a full and complete stop. The only way you get off the ride is when you die.

Once we realize that we are all pretty much in the same boat, and that we are no better or worse than anyone else, we can start building those intimate close deep relationships without fear.

No one is better than you. No one is worse than you. We all have choices to make, some are good, some are bad.

We are all washed by the same blood. If we choose it, wonderful! If not, that's a choice.

Once we Seek First To Understand, then we can make in-roads into people's hearts and minds and show them the Love and the Word that we've seen ..

Love you guys ..

Dale

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Need some prayer

Just got a pretty important and somewhat frightening phone call.

James just told me that I am going to be speaking at the next M5 ..

Wow ..

For those who don't know: James Smith is my real estate mentor. He travels around the country giving seminars on how to invest in real estate. He's worth huge-mega-ugly money (like third world country government money) and his big-huge-5-day-up-at-dawn-pride-swallowing-siege wealth expose seminar is called M5 (5 million in 5 years is what it stands for).

And he wants me to go there and teach a section called "The Possibilities!" Basically it's a rundown on what I've done since I went to M5 (I went in August 05) and what I was able to take out of the course.

So .. it's kind of a big deal .. and it's kind of intimidating .. not sure what to say or how to format it or anything ..

So I'm asking the prayer warriors to throw down some serious-ninja-super-duper prayer for me.

I'm not used to being in this situation (not having a least a 'song and dance' type of response to a challenge) ..

I can't 'fake it till I make it' on this one ..

*sigh* Growth!!! What a wonderful thing .. thanks God, for this .. just, you know, thanks, Big Man ..

You know how they say "be careful what you ask for"? ha ha ha .. yeah.

Thanks everyone .. you rock ..

Dale

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Sitting here waiting for my best friend

I just got back from a three-day seminar in Santa Rosa. I spent three nights alone.

I'm not used to that.

I miss her presence, her scent, the soothing familiar breathing as she sleeps.

For some reason, this time was different. I missed her more than usual. Deeply. Achingly.

I awoke several times during the night looking for her.

She is my best friend, my first real romantic love, my heart.

Thank you, Jesus, for the gift of Diane. Thank you for grasping me by the arms as a young husband when I would get angry or do something hurtful or stupid. (Thanks for still doing that.)

Thank you for the wife of my youth.

Thank you for the love that you showed me on the cross, the shadow of which I feel now with her.

Thank you Jesus.

I love you, Diane.

Dale

Monday, August 07, 2006

Old poems

Starting this blog has made me think about what I would like to say to the generations that may read it as I grow older. What would they like to know about me? About this time? About this life God is revealing to me? About how I feel?

I went through some old files I had on a hard drive from when I was in college. I trashed the computer long ago, but I backed-up the drive and put the files on my laptop. As my mind ponders the questions I asked myself above, I thought I may find something relevant there.

I wrote some poems in college (more like prose poems -- everything I write turns out like fiction eventually, even song lyrics). Most of them are weak, but this one, for me, holds up after 11 years.

Thought you may like it.

Untitled

I sat beside the hospital bed — a sanitized, anonymous white.
My son was very small between the cashew-colored
blanket and that nameless white; against the expanse of the mattress
his 42 pounds looked like a sailboat on a lonely bay.
A nurse was talking to his mother about asthma
asphyxiation, deficient oxygen to the brain.
I simply stroked away the hair from his forehead,
caressed as much of his face
as tubes and electrodes would allow, and whispered,
“You’re the best little boy in the world.”

Pacing the hall outside of his room,
I stepped on a plastic ball, one of those green and blue marbled
numbers that ping-pongs off the walls then shoots to No Man’s Land
behind the refrigerator.
A girl hobbled out of an adjoining room in chase.
Her head was wrapped with gauze,
the same bleached unnamed white as the bedsheets.
Only the top left corner of her face was visible,
from her lower eyelid to her hairline.
Even from such a small portion,
I could see that her skin looked burned,
thin black stripes like barbecued steak.
She looked up at me with a half closed eye.
I knelt, took the ball between my thumb
and forefinger and handed it to her, saying,
“Is this yours?”
“Thanks,” her mouth muffled as she grabbed her ball.
A woman sitting in the room watched the exchange.
I suppose revulsion and pity were apparent on my face,
because she said, “She has leukemia.”
I shivered. “Why the marks?”
“Her skin is too delicate for her treatments,
but she’d be dead by now without it.”
The girl bounced her ball,
then held it up to me.
She smiled behind the mask
and the half closed left eye.

The doctors finished with my son.
He dozed,
the short pained breaths not allowing for any real sleep.
I resumed my duty,
caressing his skin so that he could relax.

How smooth it was.



Aaron had asthma as a baby pretty badly .. this was a slice of that ..

Dale

Yeah! I knew I liked him for a reason ..

You Are Superman

Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
And pretty cute too. No wonder you're the most popular superhero ever!
Supes rocks..
Shut up, Joseph, yes he does!

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Now I'm cool .. I have a blog

OK OK, I have to admit that I ripped off the name for my blog from Candace .. she painted a picture which had the caption "Faith begins at 31 feet" in reference to the fact that rhinos can't see beyond 30 feet yet they run anyway.

Sorry, Candace .. it was too good to leave alone. If you want it back, tell me and I'll change it. I'll make up some good excuse why I had to change it to save face.

So this is my blog. One of the blessings of a blog for me is the fact that it can be saved and passed down to your kids (like a virtual journal.) "A life worth living is a life worth recording" and all that ..

So I'm here to chronicle my life so that in 40 years my kids can laugh at how goofy I am.

Again.

Talk to you all soon, and if anyone needs help, email me and let's rock ..

Dale